Wednesday, April 30, 2008

For love of mastiffs

Let’s see…Two children are at school, the third is waking up. The Beasts are outside, but not fed. Four cats have been petted, their food bowl uncovered (Neoism). One gecko has water and ate crickets last night. Hmmm…I think I can relax for a minute.

And then my brain kicks in…sigh… Our backyard makes me cringe—I’m still cringing from taking The Beasts out. So many holes to fill, so many beasts to re-dig them… Some holes appear bottomless—I’m expecting tourists to pop up from other countries. This could work in our favor though…possible college money via a lemonade/sandwich stand.

I know I’ve explained The Beasts penchant for buried rocks, which explains the holes, but have I described their play techniques? They each weigh about 130 lbs…small as mastiffs go. They rush at each other, rear like wild horses, crash chests, and shoulder wrestle…over and over. The earth shakes, sod dislodges, rocks fly, muddy ruts develop—it’s actually pretty cool watching them…except for the havoc they wreak.

Unfortunately, it’s a tiny crisis this year. We have three sets of grandparents arriving in June for J’s graduation. We’re human, we like to impress them—The Beasts just like to drool and show off their rock tunnels. The backyard needs to be rototilled and re-sodded, The Beasts need a farm, neither of which will happen in the next month.

I’m cringing again…time to refill my coffee cup and formulate a plan. I’ll go see if any tourists have popped up—if I’m lucky, one will have a degree in horticulture. So much for relaxing… :)

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